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Thread: Why Chuck Norris Dives Deeper Than You

  1. #1
    San Diego rEvo Mafia "The Brandon" has a spectacular aura about "The Brandon" has a spectacular aura about "The Brandon" has a spectacular aura about "The Brandon" has a spectacular aura about "The Brandon" has a spectacular aura about "The Brandon" has a spectacular aura about "The Brandon"'s Avatar
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    Why Chuck Norris Dives Deeper Than You

    This idea has been going around for a while and is pretty funny when you make the facts specific to your job or hobby. I was thinking about making a Rebreather Chuck Norris t-shirt. My brother did this for his F-18 Squadron and it was pretty cool.

    How many comedians out there can come up with something snappy relating to:

    The Top Ten Reasons Why Chuck Norris Dives Deeper Than You?
    Here is my stab at it...................

    10. Chuck Norris' onboard DIL is sufficient bailout gas.

    9. Chuck Norris dove the Doria, 17 times in one day without changing his scrubber.

    8. Sorb is too scared to breakthrough for Chuck Norris.

    7. CE has has failed to meet the Chuck Norris standard.

    6. Chuck Norris took a dump one day, and called it double 130's.

    5. The new Chuck Norris WOB Kit, is Chuck punching your lungs until you breathe like a man.

    4. Chuck Norris dove the Titanic, on a Sport Kiss, twice.

    3. The Chuck Norris homebuilt, is now Top Secret Navy property.

    2. ???????

    1. ???????


    Here are some good ones from the website. Chuck Norris Facts

    When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
    There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

    Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.

    Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
    There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
    When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

  2. #2
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    Re: Why Chuck Norris Dives Deeper Than You

    2. Chuck Norris's opinions about RB diving are even respected by AM.

  3. #3
    Nailer99 Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith's Avatar
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    Re: Why Chuck Norris Dives Deeper Than You

    Quote Originally Posted by cramerdn  View Original Post
    2. Chuck Norris's opinions about Rebreather diving are even respected by AM.

    Green sent! I F*&king love you Aussies! Plus, I'm drunk.

  4. #4
    Nailer99 Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith has much to be proud of Joshua Smith's Avatar
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    Re: Why Chuck Norris Dives Deeper Than You

    OK, I think I have one:


    Chuck Norris doesn't recognize partial pressure. Chuck Norris uses full pressure, or nothing at all.

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    Re: Why Chuck Norris Dives Deeper Than You

    When Chuck Norris dives with the great white, the shark is in the cage.

    Regards Anton

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    Re: Why Chuck Norris Dives Deeper Than You

    Quote Originally Posted by Nailer99  View Original Post
    OK, I think I have one:


    Chuck Norris doesn't recognize partial pressure. Chuck Norris uses full pressure, or nothing at all.
    This is hilarious!

  7. #7
    Urrrgh! Ukon is an unknown quantity at this point Ukon's Avatar
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    Re: Why Chuck Norris Dives Deeper Than You

    Chuck Norris doesn't need a scrubber. Chuck Norris scares CO2 out of the loop!

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    Re: Why Chuck Norris Dives Deeper Than You

    Quote Originally Posted by Nailer99  View Original Post
    Green sent! I F*&king love you Aussies! Plus, I'm drunk.
    ditto except i am sober

  9. #9
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    Re: Why Chuck Norris Dives Deeper Than You

    Brandon, this is hilarious...

    a few more and I think we should make some shirts...

    Chuck Norris doesn't need a BOV he is resistant to CO2 breakthru.

  10. #10
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    Re: Why Chuck Norris Dives Deeper Than You

    I'm finding this kind of addictive!

    Chuck Norris never has to worry about a CO2 hit. CO2 wouldn't be dumb enough to hit Chuck Norris.

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