Jellyfish - hope this never happens to you!

nmanfield · 23rd May 2006, 06:41

Next time you have a bad day at work ... think of this guy. Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.
Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest.

Needless to say, she won.

Hi Sue,
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.
Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.
As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit.
This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints.
What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt.
I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.
Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.
So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job."
Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, Is this a jellyfish bad day?
May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!!

Drmike · 23rd May 2006, 06:48

Yes the diver had a bad day.....but Id rather be the diver than the jellyfish!

JonnyB · 23rd May 2006, 08:48

We have had this happening to us as well on a commercial job running warm water suits, some "technician" who was responsible for the daily rutines took of the filter on the pump and forgot to put it back thus sucking up a jellyfish and therefor making a poor diver very agonated, not me thought!

No a pleasant experience i can say, but sure was very funny!

/Jonny

Gibbon · 23rd May 2006, 10:23

Funny, but very very old and certainly not news

***schford*** · 23rd May 2006, 18:28

hehheh good one

lizardland · 23rd May 2006, 18:47

Quote: (Originally Posted by Gibbon)

Funny, but very very old and certainly not news

It must be at least seven years since it appeared on Techdiver, probably more

onetime · 23rd May 2006, 19:31

Quote: (Originally Posted by lizardland)

It must be at least seven years since it appeared on Techdiver, probably more

I'd say a fair bit older than that. I recall hearing this story not long after I got OW certified back in '92.

**UWSojourner** · 24th May 2006, 05:16

Quote: (Originally Posted by onetime)

I'd say a fair bit older than that. I recall hearing this story not long after I got OW certified back in '92.

Yeah, but jellyfish crack-filler ... that's timeless!

Ben Field · 24th May 2006, 08:26

Quote: (Originally Posted by Gibbon)

Funny, but very very old and certainly not news

Funny stuff.... but how long is it going to be before someone posts the one about a pair of dead divers found after the forest fire or the pair of divers who opened a hatch and wound up wandering down the channel tunnel.

I like the jellyfish story but for the general non-diving public its just another urban myth.

BTW- Did I tell you about this new wreck I dived recently, found it just off the Essex coast near Ipswich, all melted at the front like it had been on fire or something, found the bell (obviously) anyone ever heard of the "Thunder Child"?

BEN

23rd May 2006, 06:41	#1 (permalink)
nmanfield Megalegalegalegadingdong! Current Rebreather/s: Megalodon Other Rebreather/s: Join Date: May 2005 Location: Odessa, Ukraine Posts: 329	Jellyfish - hope this never happens to you! Next time you have a bad day at work ... think of this guy. Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won. Hi Sue, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut. So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job." Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, Is this a jellyfish bad day? May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!! __________________ Tub 'O Lard
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23rd May 2006, 06:48	#2 (permalink)
Drmike Custom Title Allowed! Current Rebreather/s: MK 15.X Ouroboros Other CCR Home Build Other Rebreather/s: Inspiration Classic Other CCR Home Build Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 3,128	Re: Jellyfish - hope this never happens to you! Yes the diver had a bad day.....but Id rather be the diver than the jellyfish! __________________ Get a girlfriend you sad twat - a Rebreather is an unfaithful mistress - dont blind yourself to her faults just because she goes down on you
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23rd May 2006, 08:48	#3 (permalink)
JonnyB Jonny The Hatch Current Rebreather/s: MK 15.X Titan Other CCR Other SCR Home Build Other Rebreather/s: Not Bought Yet Inspiration Classic Megalodon Sport Kiss Classic Kiss Other CCR Other SCR Home Build Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Sweden (Stockholm)/Cyprus(Ayia Napa) Posts: 944	Re: Jellyfish - hope this never happens to you! We have had this happening to us as well on a commercial job running warm water suits, some "technician" who was responsible for the daily rutines took of the filter on the pump and forgot to put it back thus sucking up a jellyfish and therefor making a poor diver very agonated, not me thought! No a pleasant experience i can say, but sure was very funny! /Jonny __________________ A quote from Crazyduck - In remembering our own Rob Davies. "Outbound flight 777 heavy you are cleared for flight Due west into that warm red Texas sunset You have angels on your wings and divers memories on your six." Rest In Peace http://www.divetekcyprus.com http://www.diveccr.com
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23rd May 2006, 10:23	#4 (permalink)
Gibbon Southern Monkey Current Rebreather/s: Megalodon Other Rebreather/s: Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: East Devon Posts: 226	Re: Jellyfish - hope this never happens to you! Funny, but very very old and certainly not news
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23rd May 2006, 18:28	#5 (permalink)
*schford* Despotic Overlord Current Rebreather/s: Megalodon Sport Kiss Other Rebreather/s: Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: London, UK Posts: 3,662	Re: Jellyfish - hope this never happens to you! hehheh good one __________________ Bailout and Kit Management account for Murphy's Law The only bad question is one you did not ask and later wish you had. Use of Rebreather World is subject to the Rebreather World Terms & Conditions of Use
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23rd May 2006, 18:47	#6 (permalink)
lizardland Yak Current Rebreather/s: MK 15.X Home Build Other Rebreather/s: Classic Kiss Home Build Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: North... Posts: 1,186	Re: Jellyfish - hope this never happens to you! Quote: (Originally Posted by Gibbon) Funny, but very very old and certainly not news It must be at least seven years since it appeared on Techdiver, probably more __________________ Can you imagine drifting along in the sea with your mouth open and a load of f***ing plankton going in? You'd like it, would you? www.westons-cider.co.uk Azerbaijani Association of Technical Divers Publicity Officer and Goat Wrangler
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23rd May 2006, 19:31	#7 (permalink)
onetime Classic KISSer #138 Current Rebreather/s: Classic Kiss Other Rebreather/s: Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: US, NJ Posts: 655	Re: Jellyfish - hope this never happens to you! Quote: (Originally Posted by lizardland) It must be at least seven years since it appeared on Techdiver, probably more I'd say a fair bit older than that. I recall hearing this story not long after I got OW certified back in '92.
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24th May 2006, 05:16	#8 (permalink)
UWSojourner Pacific Northwest Current Rebreather/s: Megalodon Other Rebreather/s: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Portland Oregon Posts: 556	Re: Jellyfish - hope this never happens to you! Quote: (Originally Posted by onetime) I'd say a fair bit older than that. I recall hearing this story not long after I got OW certified back in '92. Yeah, but jellyfish crack-filler ... that's timeless!
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24th May 2006, 08:26	#9 (permalink)
Ben Field CK+Shearwater Current Rebreather/s: Classic Kiss Other Rebreather/s: Sport Kiss Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: London, England Posts: 1,482	Re: Jellyfish - hope this never happens to you! Quote: (Originally Posted by Gibbon) Funny, but very very old and certainly not news Funny stuff.... but how long is it going to be before someone posts the one about a pair of dead divers found after the forest fire or the pair of divers who opened a hatch and wound up wandering down the channel tunnel. I like the jellyfish story but for the general non-diving public its just another urban myth. BTW- Did I tell you about this new wreck I dived recently, found it just off the Essex coast near Ipswich, all melted at the front like it had been on fire or something, found the bell (obviously) anyone ever heard of the "Thunder Child"? BEN __________________ www.hugsac.org.uk Beware Fridge Suck
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